AoA honors today’s grandparents by sharing the individual stories of six grandparents identified by the Administration on Aging’s National Family Caregiver Support Program grantee organizations.

Frank and Francisca Colores

Frank and Francisca Colores have participated in the United Cerebral Palsy of Southern Arizona’s Aging Caregivers and the Exceptional Child (ACE) project during the last two years.  

Mr. Colores was born in the U.S., and Francisca met him after she emigrated from Mexico. Frank worked as a pipe fitter in Tucson until he retired while Francisca made a home for their children, all of whom have grown and left home except for Claudia who is in her early 20s.

The Colores’ took four children into their home because their mother was involved with substance abuse and eventually left the city. They since have adopted the children: Gabriel, aged 13; Jose, aged 11; Jesus, aged 9; and Manuel, aged 6. As Mr. Colores said in an interview, “it was hard for the children at first—they wanted their mother and were sad and lonely for a while.” Now the children have adjusted and both Mr. and Mrs. Colores and their aunt Claudia, provide an active and loving environment.

The Colores’ family faces many challenges. Two of the children have disabilities: one has serious hearing loss that was identified when he was in first grade. The other grandson has a shunt to prevent hydro encephalitis. Advocacy for services has been needed in the school the boys attend, and the Colores have been active in learning about special education laws and rights to services. Frank is waiting for a liver transplant. The family’s financial resources are stretched to the limit with four extra mouths to feed and increasing medical expenses.

The Colores’ joined a support group for grandparents, and became involved with the ACE program through that group. This project, funded by the Administration on Aging’s National Family Caregiver Support Program, enabled the Colores family to participate in a focus group to identify family needs. As an outgrowth of the support group, the Colores’ family is acting as a mentor to another family. Because of his clear commitment to raising his grandchildren and willingness to share the family story, Frank Colores was filmed in the first ACE project video, Grandfamilies.

He was happy to tell his family’s story as a way of providing information and support for other grandparents. The ACE project published a Resource Guide in part based on his strong statement identifying a “resource phone book” as an identified need during the focus group session in which he participated. span>

All of the Colores family recently took part in a three-day retreat for grandparent-headed families funded by the Pima Council on Aging; facilitated by the Kindship and Adoption Resource and Education Family Center; and led by the ACE Family Outreach Coordinator. The retreat enabled whole families to stay at the beautiful Tanque Verde Guest Ranch and enjoy activities such as swimming, horseback riding, and community gatherings. The grandparents (the majority Latino and aged over 60) participated in wellness activities including yoga, massage, and acupuncture.

Expert speakers discussed the challenges that face grandparent-headed families. The retreat also included plays and presentations that enabled the caregivers to see the value of their work. Frank, Francisca, and the children came away happy with the days off, rejuvenated with energy to keep on caregiving, and with new friends and new resources.

Shig Kihara

Shig Kihara is a grandfather of three children and an infant. He also is a caregiver for his 92 year-old mother. At the time of this interview, Mr. Kihara just finished his weekly route as a volunteer escort for Asian Community Center (ACC) Rides, a para-transit program for older adults operated by the ACC in Sacramento, California. At the same time, two of his grandchildren entertained their great grandmother and her friends at ACC’s Drop-In Respite program while being watched by their aunts. Both his sisters and the grandchildren have become regular volunteers at the respite program.

His athletic build and active lifestyle obscures Mr. Kihara’s age. At 70, he still jogs three miles every other day, lifts weights three times a week, and plays volleyball twice a week. In 1968, he realized that smoking had affected his health dramatically. He had a hard time running from one side of a room to the other without experiencing complete exhaustion. Mr. Kihara maintains his agility and vigor to keep up with the demands of being a grandparent, caregiver, and volunteer.

“Being a grandparent is a lot of fun. You watch your grandkids grow in ways you never had the chance to do with your own kids,” Mr. Kihara reflects. “With grandchildren, you see them once in a while and really notice changes.” As a caregiver, he is one of seven children in a tight-knit family taking turns caring for their mother who has Alzheimer’s disease. “As a male caregiver, the most challenging part is helping Mom with personal hygiene, like going to the bathroom. For the grandkids, there are fewer challenges, although keeping them occupied and engaged can be tough,” he notes.

Caregiving to two generations requires a lot of patience. Mr. Kihara hopes that should he ever need care in the future, his family will exercise the same patience and understanding he tries to develop. He hopes to stay healthy enough to “pay back the elders,” and this is why he volunteers at the respite program and the ACC Rides. “I enjoy helping others, although before Mom got sick and started coming to respite, I never even thought about volunteering.”

Jesse Williams

Jesse Williams is the 82-year-old full-time caregiver of her seven-year-old great granddaughter Dorese, whose mother passed away during childbirth. Mrs. Williams also provides childcare to her three-month-old great-granddaughter while the mother works a swing shift. Rather than bemoan her situation, Mrs. Williams says she is blessed because of the help she receives from a grandparent support group called Grandparents Offering Love and Discipline (GOLD) that meets once a month in her hometown of Danville, Illinois. GOLD offers information, socialization, support, and networking for grandparents raising their grandchildren. Mrs. Williams describes the group as a big family. “The first time we got together we just cried a lot,” she said. “It helps to have someone with whom to talk.”

Mrs. Williams is the oldest member of the group and the only member who is caring for her great grandchildren. She says the other members of GOLD are amazed that she is still able to care for a child but she sees things differently. “Some have four or five grandkids they are raising. I’ve only got one.” Raising a grandchild can be strenuous despite Ms. Williams’s positive attitude especially when the financial concerns for aging relative caregivers are taken into account.

The costs are astronomical for Dorese’s school supplies and food for Dorese combined with medication for Mrs. Williams and her husband of 65 years, who was recently diagnosed with cancer. “When I found GOLD, I jumped!” Mrs. Williams explains, “The support group tells us where we can get free lunch for the kids and money for school supplies.”

Mrs. Williams says GOLD also helps the grandparents get access to needed medications so they will be around to see the kids grow up. “I had heart surgery three years ago and I have glaucoma. A little bottle of pills costs $100 a month!” The support group provides assistance with housing concerns and transportation to doctors appointments and to the support group. Although Mrs. Williams still drives a car, she says it is important to those who need help with transportation. Mrs. Williams knows she and grandparents raising grandchildren don’t have to go it alone as caregivers thanks to support groups such as GOLD.

Albert Garcia

Albert Garcia, from Rochester, New York, assumed responsibility for his granddaughter Renee, aged 12 almost seven years ago. Mr. Garcia “took care of her really from birth.” The courts awarded him custody of Renee because the parents were not able to care for her due to drug dependency. It has not been an easy road for Mr. Garcia, but he has stayed committed to doing his best for his granddaughter.

In 2001, Mr. Garcia attended the first Rochester Kinship Care Conference, sponsored by Catholic Family Center’s Kinship Care Resource Network. The staff encouraged him to accept assistance, and helped the family obtain benefits and services including Medicaid, Medicare and Social Security benefits, legal assistance, a new green card, and medical care.

In 2002, Mr. Garcia wrote: “My granddaughter is reaching her teenage years and needs me, as her grandfather, to help her through these more challenging times. Presently we are attending a support group and I hope to be attending some parenting classes in the near future. Even though these last couple of years were difficult, my granddaughter is happy and content living with me. I love my granddaughter and she loves me. I will continue to be there for her through the good and bad times ahead.”

Grace Broken Leg

Grace Broken Leg, a 78-year-old great-grandmother living on the Rosebud Reservation in South Dakota, is raising her thirteen great-grandchildren and participates in the Native American Caregiver Support Program. She wants the best for her great-grandchildren and encourages their education. She is very proud of four-year-old Alex, who just graduated from Headstart, and will be going to school full-time this fall.

Ms. Broken Leg stresses the importance of a traditional education and wants her great-grandchildren to understand their Native American culture. She speaks her native Lakota language to the children. She also stresses the Lakota cultural values and encourages each great-grandchild live by them, including the importance of staying active, spending time outdoors and using the land to help feed the family. She plants and cares for her one-half acre garden and cans the vegetables to eat with dried meat that she prepares herself.

Winters can be harsh on the Rosebud Reservation and heating one’s home is not an easy task. Ms. Broken Leg relies on her woodstove to keep her home warm and the food she grows in her garden to supplement the diet for herself and her thirteen great-grandchildren to get through the long months.

Loretta Hollow Horn Bear Lyotte

Loretta Hollow Horn Bear-Iyotte also participates in the Rosebud Reservation Native American Caregiver Support Program. She is 79 years old, and is raising her five grandchildren. She has recently adopted her 14-year-old grandson through the Indian Child Welfare Act program.

Ms. Hollow Horn Bear-Iyotte faces many challenges on a daily basis. Never having learned to drive, she walks everywhere. Walking five miles to accomplish a task is a common event for her. She says this keeps her healthy. She brings her grandchildren along on her walks and teaches them their native language along the way.

Ms. Hollow Horn Bear-Iyotte attends all the health fairs and wellness clinics offered by the Tribe. She promotes a healthy lifestyle in her daily activities. She wants her grandchildren to grow up knowing the values and traditions of the Sicangu. She feels that it is vital for the younger generation to respect their land and carry on their Lakota culture. Understanding and knowing their own history will help them to live long, happy self-sufficient lives.

The Rosebud Reservation Native American Caregiver Support Program has delivered services and resources to these two grandmothers that assist them in caring for their grandchildren, including emotional support needed to provide a healthy environment for the daily care of these young children.