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Grandparents and adopted
grandchildren
Newswise — Grandparents of adopted
grandchildren relate to them as an integral part of the family –
just as they relate to their biological grandchildren. This was
revealed in research conducted at the University of Haifa School of
Social Work.
This research is unique in the field in that it
evaluated adoptive relationships from the viewpoint of grandparents;
previous research examined relationships from the viewpoint of
parents and children.
Fifteen grandparents between the ages of 59 and
90 participated in the research which was conducted by Ms. Nira
Degani under the supervision of Prof. Ariela Lowenstein and Dr. Eli
Buchbinder of the Faculty of Social Welfare and Health Studies at
the University of Haifa.
The research identified five stages in the
development of emotional relationships between grandparents and
their adopted grandchildren.
In the first stage, a
grandparent views his adopted grandchild as a
solution to the anguish caused by his son's or
daughter's inability to bring a child into a world.
In the second stage, while a strong emotional
connection is still absent, the grandparent looks to rationalize the
adoption and convinces himself that his children have saved a child
that may otherwise have been left uncared for.
The third stage of emotional development is
marked by a superficial emotional connection and in the fourth
stage, the grandparent accepts the child as in integral part of the
multi-generational family.
In the final stage, grandparents begin to
express concern that when their adopted grandchild turns 18, he will
begin to search for details about his biological family and may
chose to establish a relationship with them and abandon his adoptive
family. According to Ms. Degani, this stage demonstrates that the
grandparents see their adopted grandchild as an inseparable member
of the family.
Ms. Degani explains that the results of this
research can benefit many couples who cannot bring children into the
world and continue to undergo difficult fertility treatments.
"Today, in many cases, couples can undergo unlimited fertility treatments
and they continue the physically and emotionally straining
treatments, often out of concern for their parents' reaction to the
idea of adoption.
Continuing treatment often harms both the
physical and emotional health of couples and may even lead to
break-up of a relationship. I believe that if couples know they will
have the support of their families and complete acceptance of an
adopted child, many will prefer to end the difficult course of
fertility treatments and opt for adoption," she summarized.
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